Tuesday, 2 January 2018

7 Life-lessons that I learnt in 2017


What a ride, 2017.

2017 was a year of forgiveness, growth and a year where I finally get to know myself better. It wasn't smooth sail journey. Along the way, I have lost some of my closest friends, had moments where I doubted myself too much, gone through periods of depression where my self-esteem and confidence level just went rock bottom. However I also made new friends, got closer to many, formed healthy relationships, and finally learned to pick myself up at times.

Here are 7 important life-lessons that I learned the past year.



1.) Don't take things personally
This was the key to my happiness in 2017. Yes, you read it right- in 2017 because I never realised how important this was until recently. When you take things personally, you are sensitive to the words or actions of others and will probably interpret in a very negative way and view yourself badly. When you allow this to happen, you are giving power to them by agreeing to what they say and do. Chances are, they weren't really meant to be targeted towards you in the first place.

2.) If you wait till you're ready, you'll be waiting for the rest of your life
At the back of my mind I've always believed in taking chances, but I doubt my choices and abilities way too much that I let great opportunities fly by. It was not until the past year that I realised I needed to change, so I finally put this into practise by stopping to think and care too much about the end-result, and do things that would help me grow.

3.) Quit pleasing people
The fact is, not everyone will like you and the things you do. I used to be such a people pleaser that it eventually led to toxic friendships/ relationships because no matter how much energy and effort you put in something or someone, there will always be that one person who criticises and dislikes you and even use you. Once you become aware of this, you'll realise your own value and stop pleasing people who do not deserve it.



4.) Be grateful for what you have
When you start to feel negative, think of the things you are grateful for. These things don't have to be big and expensive, but rather the small things in life; food and water you get each day, the roof you live under, or even education. Some people don't even have these basic necessities in life. A change in perspective can immediately change your mood and attitude in life.

5.) Learn to say no, if it makes you uncomfortable or unhappy in any way
This is actually quite similar to life-lesson no. 3.  As a people pleaser, I know it is extremely difficult to say 'no' sometimes, but it is your life after all, so be responsible for the choices that you make. If you only know how to say 'yes', people will use and manipulate you.

6.) Let go of perfectionism. You're mistakes and flaws do not define you
I am a firm believer that you learn and grow the most from your mistakes. Of course, that does not mean that you should allow mistakes to happen whenever, but don't knock yourself down over a small, simple mistake. Regardless of how big or small it is, they surely happened for a reason.


7.) The 5 by 5 rule
Relax. If it's not going to matter in the next 5 years, don't waste more than 5 seconds or 5 minutes or 5 hours thinking about it. I do not deal with stress very well so this rule really helped me to stop overthinking and stressing out all the time.


Alright folks. This was a lengthy post. I hope you all learned something from the past year and let's look forward to an amazing year ahead.

Keep in touch! XO

Instagram: @stephanieso
Twitter: @stephanieso_


Email: info.stephyt@gmail.com

Monday, 18 December 2017

Living with a shy personality and social anxiety

Growing up I have always been a shy person. I was always the quiet girl in class- not looking at people's eyes when talking, not putting my hands up when I got a question or definitely know the answer the teacher just asked, and most importantly, not standing up and defending for myself when I needed to.

However, I thought it was completely normal because it really didn't cause anyone trouble. I saw myself as the quiet and 'uncool' or average girl in class. It was only until recent years that I realised how extremely shy and self-conscious am I of a person. Going to interviews scare the crap out of me. I would not get a good night's sleep, so naturally on the day I would be tired as hell. I would drink a coffee (or two) just so to mentally and physically prepare myself for it. Now you may think: okay but this is how most people feel too. Trust me, I fake it so well that you don't even see how much I'm sweating and how fast my heart is beating with a million thoughts/ second racing in my mind. Meeting new people and going to social events scares me. My hands would get all clammy and shaky and I would get so self-conscious of myself that I constantly think that people are judging me at this very moment. Sometimes people think that I'm hard to approach and very high-maintenance because I don't talk much, but that's simply because I'm afraid that anything I say would somehow annoy or offend you. I secretly want to talk to you so bad and befriend you, but it's just so hard.

However, this makes me extremely grateful for the friends I have made in my life and people who I consider my loved ones. You make me feel comfortable, wanted and most importantly, you turn my weaknesses into strengths. I still haven't 100% conquered my fears of meeting new people and going to interviews and social events, but it is something I am working on. This topic is a long one- perhaps I'll share more of my stories in future posts.







Keep in touch! XO

Instagram: @stephanieso
Twitter: @stephanieso_


Email: info.stephyt@gmail.com

Tuesday, 5 December 2017

Anxious uncertainty; unforeseeable future

Identity crises- it is real and legitimate, you all. I repeat, it is real. As long as I am aware I have been suffering from identity crisis for WELL over a year now and it absolutely sucks. Everyday, you wake up and there is at least one moment that you think to yourself: who am I? what am I supposed to be? It took me more than 8 months to come back to this blog and decide what I should talk about because I felt like the past few posts I just did just so I have some content on here; typing this blog post took me more than 10, 11 tries because I simply did not know what to talk about. It's a struggle. Not to mention the frequent anxiety and depression that comes with it- it hits you like a truck. It's absolutely crazy I know because some people simply think that you're just being sensitive and overdramatic and immature.

During the past 8 months of being gone, I've been doing some thinking. A LOT of thinking. But frankly, it didn't really get me anywhere since I still do not know what I should be doing in life; in my studies, post graduation or in the future. It just seems...so bleak? 8 months absolutely whizzed by and two years later I will be a Fashion Technology graduate. Darn.

Whilst being gone I've been trying some things I like (haven't reached the stage of love or with mad passion though) e.g. photography, gym and being healthy and all that, and just simply enjoying life. Here's a little throwback to September, when days were longer and my skin was tanner.

If you are currently suffering from or have suffered from identity crisis, I feel for you deeply. And I hope that one day, we both will get out from this. Oh, and if you came from Instagram- hello! I really appreciate it. And I hope you'll come back for my next blog post!






Keep in touch! XO

Instagram: @stephanieso
Twitter: @stephanieso_


Email: info.stephyt@gmail.com

Saturday, 22 April 2017

HONG KONG ROOFTOP ADVENTURES | STEPHANIE SO


A recollection of the many rooftop adventures I have had in Hong Kong so far/ Aug-Dec 2016.




















Keep in touch! XO

Instagram: @stephanieso
Twitter: @stephanieso_


Email: info.stephyt@gmail.com

Saturday, 15 April 2017

HELLO, HELLO BABY | STEPHANIE SO


Hello, hello baby, you called I can't hear a thing. I have got no service in the club you say, say?

Despite my never ending love for black clothing, I've also secretly got a weakness for baby blue and light, pastel colours. I thrifted this Levi's denim jacket from a local vintage store in Hong Kong called Midwest Vintage for about $200. May be a bit pricey to some thrifting professionals but I truly think it is a gem!




Keep in touch! XO

Instagram: @stephanieso
Twitter: @stephanieso_


Email: info.stephyt@gmail.com